The Band T-shirt

Ah the band T-shirt. Using this as a social medium to start conversations, discuss favourite albums, seeing them play live and most of all favourite song. This however has progressed into a fashion statement due to Topman and his pathetic style. Take for example the infamous “Ramones” T-shirt – I have no issue with the band themselves, they’re just trying to make a buck out of these gullible donkeys (and they do). And also I have listened to some of their works, but I am not a fan. It’s marketing at its best form, so in a way whoever is responsible for the idea fair play to them. Because if it’s retro it’s cool right?

I have a strong opinion on this particular form of merchandise and I’m sure 90% of people of actually appreciate music will agree.

ONLY WEAR THE T-SHIRT IN PUBLIC IF YOU ARE ACTUALLY A FAN
(by fan I mean having listened to more than one song and know a small amount of background of the band, enough to back yourself out of an argument anywhoo)

Obviously an event has sparked this thought process to write these pixels. So picture the scene, two of my mates, and myself just chilling outside having a chat (when I say chat I actually mean singing Linkin Park songs incredibly loud, just for the pure irony). Everything is running smoothly, everyone’s happy, there is a good atmosphere. The next moment there seems to be a slight miss-judgement in balance (caused by both parties) between my buddy and another chap. This led to a drink spillage situation and a slight trouser wetting. Rationally, the said wet trouser party would brush it off, carry on with the night and feel terrible in the morning. But not this young man, he was pissed. After some light mumbling and complaining and a few apologies from our end, my friend decided that his testosterone levels where just about right to have some fun with this wet young man. Yes you guessed it, a Ramones T-shirt wearing wet man.

I love it when you have two fuelled males ready to beat the shit out of each other, you just have to laugh at the pointless process on which their brains must be going through. What rational human bean wants to beat the living day lights out of another human bean just for some Kudos? It blows my mind. As usual the first stages of combat are infiltrated by a friend using their body as a shield to take them away from the banal, pointless situation. Level two of combat within this situation was my friend then pointing out his T-shirt, in a sarcastic, ridiculously funny approach. This then fuelled the wet man into a state of rage at his garments being mocked. Now taking it even further, when asked to name a Ramones album, he was fired into a state of confusion and angst. Being questioned about your public statement is usually an easy situation to overcome – but obviously the wet man had little knowledge or background to have a word in this. Then suddenly out of nowhere wet man blurted “Rock ‘N Roll High School” – avast! He had named a Ramones song. But anyone familiar to a playstation back in the early 2000’s will have most likely played that addictive skater game “Tony Hawkes” (well pretty much everyone had played it). Within the soundtrack to the second release of the game features that very song. “Well that narrows it down to Tony Hawkes, well done mate” – replied my friend. Did the wet man have any further ammo? No he didn’t indeed. To which he realised the social put-down that he has just received was agonising and dampened his aggression. Throughout this whole animal procedure I was stood nearby, listening but having no part to play. I believe I laughed a few times, but didn’t say one word, in his response I was being pointed at aggressively and words were muttered. I’m unsure as to what the rest of the words were that came from his mouth. By this point the wet mans friend had become embarrassed and thought this situation was to intellectually fuel to continue, wet man was then taken away.

I later found out that I was almost to receive a severe thrashing from wet man, and named me “fucky, mc fuckerson” – that is correct. For standing still, laughing at the situation I was almost pummelled and name called.

So in conclusion, wearing a band T-shirt may make you look cool. But in the eyes of the sane and rational individual, you are a cunt.

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Jack Stovin

Hello. My name is Jack. I'm the founder of Digital Warble and a Copywriter based in Amsterdam.

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